Film: GameCast: Abhishek Bachchan, Anupam Kher, Kangana Ranaut, Shahana Goswami, Boman Irani, Sarah Jane Dias, Jimmy ShergillProducer: Excel EntertainmentRating: I’m sure in Abhinay Deo’s head, Game must have seemed like Ocean’s Eleven. Stylish suits, paper sharp cheekbones, girls with smoky eyes, and lots of overcoats. The mysterious city of Istanbul with its intriguing mosques and its decadent nightlife. A stopover in a mythical island off the coast of Greece. Some amount of seedy Bangkok, seamy Mumbai and classic London, which allows Kangna Ranaut to test her English once again on us (she tries, but sorry, a British investigating officer she ain’t). Think of Ocean’s Eleven meets Abbas Mustan and you have the genre of Game. A movie with a B-grade plot of twists and turns dreamed up by a particularly frenetic scriptwriter (Althea Kaushal) and an A-grade budget. Which is why one is not surprised when one reads the titles. It’s a movie co produced by Eros Pictures and Excel Entertainment and never the twain can meet–one is the maker of Golmaal and the other is the maker of Dil Chahta Hai.The result: a horrible hyrbid. The story, such as the elaborate plot is, has one cussed old Agatha Christie type of patriarch who calls four people to his island for a grand denouement. He’s Anupam Kher, a billionaire called Kabir Malhotra, and the four unfortunate individuals are Abhishek Bachchan, pout in place, playing a nightclub owner and drug runner; Shahana Goswami, a drunken journalist who looks as louche as she sounds; Boman Irani overacting madly, playing an Indian politician running for prime minister in Thailand; and Jimmy Shergill, playing an actor Vikram Kapoor who ran down a young girl in a drunken driving accident. Everyone has a dark secret which connects them to each other. Sigh. Yes, it’s that sort of a story.advertisementThe upshot is that someone gets shot, allowing Sia Agnihotri, that’s Kangna trying to do an Angelina Jolie, to carry a gun, a strange accent (the result of an accent coach we are told) and lots of grey power suits. She will nail the victim, but not before Bachchan gets to play contact sports with all manner of goons across continents. He punches, kicks, whacks and lunges at various hapless crooks, pummeling his way through. That’s when he’s not jogging through the streets of Istanbul.It’s not enough. Sarah Jane Dias tries hard to inject some oomph, with blood red lipstick and dark eyes. But it’s all quite pointless–which is fine. Thrillers are not meant to have much of a point except to thrill, but the murderer is so obvious that the repeated red herrings only serve to irritate. By the time Bachchan really gets going, making insider jokes about Chelsea, appreciating a fine wine and reading Murakami, toio much money has flown down the Bosphorus.There is some good news though. Bachchan is looking in character, fitter than he’s been, and more romantic than he’s been allowed to be.They could, however, have saved a bit on his costumes and given Anupam Kher a better beard.